“What’s the hardest thing about aging?” The question caught me off guard.
My response: “Hmmm…no one’s asked me that before. I’ll have to think about it.”
The context was a discussion with a young woman about how to help some older folks in our church, but I am aging too so my answer to her came from my own experiences. I’m a 67 year old widow, living in a senior community, with more years behind me than in front of me. Though I wouldn’t think of myself as a gerontology expert, I do fit the mold, so here goes.
If I had to roll up aging difficulties into one word it would be LOSS.
If we live long enough, we will lose health, hearing, vision, joint flexibility, sleep and the ability to bounce back quickly. I’m unable to help in the ways I used to. I’ve already noticed the parent/child roles reversing, as my kids have begun looking out for me more. More than likely, I will progressively lose independence, when multitasking becomes more difficult, sharp memories fade, and at some point, I may need to surrender my driver’s license. I would suggest the most difficult loss during these years would be having to say goodbye to people. Five years ago, I lost my husband and my parents. Since then I’ve been to multiple funerals of friends in my peer group. I’m losing time too. There are not enough hours or days left to complete every travel dream or finish special projects. These days there’s a lot of talk about “making memories.” I hope I don’t lose them too, but I might. There are plenty of threats to long term memories accompanying old age.
BUT! HOLD ON!
Losses are real, but aging comes with HUGE gains!
God promises in Psalm 92 that “The righteous man (the one who has put his faith in Christ) will flourish like a palm tree, he will grow like a cedar in Lebanon.” (v.12) Did you know that Cedrus libani grows to 130 feet with an 8 foot diameter trunk? It lives on rocky hillsides, and exudes strength.
How does a believer grow strong over the years? How do his roots go down deep into the rocks so he can flourish and grow? Being “Planted in the house of the LORD, they will flourish in the courts of our God.” (v.13) In order to thrive we must stay close to the Lord, dwelling with Him, hanging on tight to Him and enjoying His qualities of faithfulness, love, justice and strength and more. He did the planting, we stay close and believe what He says in His word.
Consider this…
“If we ever really grow in the courts of the Lord’s house we must be planted there, for no tree grows in God’s garden self-sown; once planted of the Lord, we shall never be rooted up, but in his courts we shall take root downward, and bring forth fruit upward to his glory forever.” C. H. Spurgeon
Once planted, there’s fruit to be born but it’s the mature fruit tree that bears the fruit. “They will still yield fruit in old age; they shall be full of sap and very green,” (v.14) When my husband was sick with dementia, and his body and mind were failing it was a tremendous comfort to know that his inner soul, who he was, the real Gary, was being renewed every day. This is true. Do you believe it? If you are a believer, God, who saved you, has promised that He will continue His work in both of us until the day of promise. In those discouraging moments, when I am not able to crouch down and paint the baseboards, or remember someone’s name, or drive long distances after dark, I MUST take God at His word. There are years behind me of experiences when I was given opportunity to trust Him and flex joyfully with His will. I have seen His good hand at work in my life, leading and guiding, and He has proven He is trustworthy. He keeps his promises just like this one “…though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.” 2 Cor. 4:16
Over the last year, I’ve been able to spend time in ministry with other widows who are older than me. I’ve observed these senior saints dealing with difficulties surrounding the Covid issues with trusting acceptance and flexibility. I long to follow their example.
Spurgeon says it better than I can…
“Aged believers possess a ripe experience, and by their mellow tempers and sweet testimonies they feed many. Even if bedridden, they bear the fruit of patience; if poor and obscure, their lowly and contented spirit becomes the admiration of those who know how to appreciate modest worth. Grace does not leave the saint when the keepers of the house do tremble; the promise is still sure though the eyes can no longer read it; the bread of heaven is fed upon when the grinders fail; and the voice of the Spirit in the soul is still melodious when the daughters of music are brought low. Blessed be the Lord for this! Because even to hoar hairs he is the I AM, who made his people, he therefore bears and carries them.” C. H. Spurgeon
My prayer and purpose especially in these later years is “to declare that the LORD is upright; He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him.”(v.15) Why wouldn’t I be peaceful with His goodness nourishing my roots every day until He calls me home?
“Every aged Christian is a letter of commendation to the immutable fidelity of Jehovah.” C. H. Spurgeon
The gains of the elderly in Christ far outweigh the losses. Praise God for that!
Cedars of Lebanon painting inspired by Psalm 92:12-15
The righteous will flourish like a palm tree,
they will grow like a cedar of Lebanon;
planted in the house of the Lord,
they will flourish in the courts of our God.
They will still bear fruit in old age,
they will stay fresh and green,
proclaiming, “The Lord is upright;
he is my Rock, and there is no wickedness in him.”